I’ve spent much of the past 2 days painting vintage tables. The post I’d planned for yesterday got lost somehow between my morning run when I composed it and having coffee with a friend.
I had an episode of Cheers on in the background but was lost in thought and rhythmic painting. A glimpse of something white and blancmange like made me realise this was an episode of seismic importance. The one where Frasier and Diane elope to Italy to wed in a pathetic, desperate move to give meaning and importance to their farce of a relationship. He is pompous but established. She is desperate, in denial and not long rejected by someone else. Fortunately for both of them they’re rescued from this attention seeking lunacy by her true love Sam. And so the Boston sitcom continues and their love triangle gains a new amusing twist.
2 years ago I faced a similar dilemma. Sanity prevailed and I sent my suitor packing bringing my own tired sitcom of a relationship abruptly to an end. But if at first you don’t succeed try, try again. And try again my partner did, narrowing the odds of a refusal by eloping Frasier-style with an underling from work. She worshipped him and envied him and had “Marry me?” flashing hypnotically across her forehead in a soft alluring light.
There’s a reason I don’t date men in their 40s. There’ s nothing decent left. It’s shocking the lengths some women will go to get married and have babies. No man worth investing dinner and conversation in is single by the time they hit 40-45. By 50 you are left with widowers and other people’s cast offs and unless you too are desperate or demented you are better off alone.
I’ve never understood why men remarry quickly. I try to learn from my mistakes not repeat them. I know what some women do to secure a husband and it no longer shocks me. If similar tactics were used to climb the career ladder there’d be no need for quotas in the boardroom (boardroom being code for bedroom amongst savvy women who plan ahead and address retirement plans).
I believe in second chances. I believe in giving old discarded things a new lease of life. But it is better to do this with your furniture or clothing than with your men. Because whilst furniture can be lovingly restored, repainted or reupholstered into something better looking and a tad more useful, men are thrown out for a reason.